WARNING: explicit contents with lots of cursing.Please leave if your intention is just to judge me. yes, you can go to hell for all i care.



yesterday was definitely a bitch. i was ultra-ultra sensitive, but couldnt do anything to vent out my anger and frustration. god knows why i was suddenly sensitive. maybe its the time of the month. blardy hell. delwin was drawing cartoons of me during physics remedial and making all the people around him laugh. that's sick. especially when im sitting in front of him. urgh.



people apparently dont regard me as a girl. that suckx. especially when they dont regard the fact that i have feelings too. so i dont fret when they tease me and stuff, like the other girls who will take heart and create tantrums. thank god im not that petty. then, maybe i should. they are fucking taking me forgranted and damn, are starting to step on my head. just because sometimes i treat the boys to food when i have extra cash to spare, they think im their bankroll. just because i dont create tantrums like a girl, they think i have no feelings. fuck them lah. and the girls too. gosh i hate the friends i have in bp. i dont even think they deserved to be called friends. fucking bunch of hypocrites. for nearly 3 years, i have gone through their taunting, teasing and whatsoever bullshit. throw me an insult, they've said it. from sec 1 till now. and i've casted a deaf ear upon it. coz i thought that they'll grow tired of it. i went along with their jokes. i didnt mind. i guess i should have. the hurt and pain amounted throughtout the years and gosh i grew to hate them so much. but then too bad the hatred doesnt stay for long, coz i will always put on a smile the next day and pretend that nothing happened. why? coz i didnt want to be petty and take it to heart. but yesterday, i really couldnt stand it. i just walked away, leaving the whole bunch of them speaking in javanese, insulting me. how the fuck do i know? considering the fact that i dont understand a single word of javanese. well thankx to anum, who looked at me so fucking guiltily and told wandi that it was bad of him to say that about me. apparently, all of them were. so fine. i walked off. who cares about them anyway. they're not even the people that i turn to when in need. fuck, their title as friends only reign in school. after that, i might as well say go to hell to all of them.



life a bitch, and then we die.



these few days have been jam-packed with activities. higher malay exam was a breeze. i definitely started on my revision and that leads to no time to play. i definitely thrive under pressure, which is good. study study study. i really couldnt be bothered with my social life anymore. god. whatever. anyway, din go to school today. stupid migraine and fever. my UTI is contracting again. fuck shit. it hurts lah. i might as well rot in bed and nobody will bother. gosh. i need a guy.



life a bitch, and then we die.



the quote that shirin and i used to live by. yes those were the days isnt it. just the two of us, working our asses off for the bastards of [insert name]. and also trying to handle the team. bah. i miss going crazy with the NW team. going from school to school getting them to support the project. yeah and wasting alot of time and effort in the end. those were the days.......